On the subject of rectal insertions and pig wankers.

"A man walks into a doctor's surgery and reveals that he has a lettuce leaf sticking out of his backside. 'Ooh! That looks bad' says the doctor. The man replies: 'That's just the tip of the iceberg'."

This joke demonstrates perfectly how very funny it is when something is somehow inserted up the tradesman's entrance. But it is something that needs to be done with comic precision and an understanding of what the correct object in the correct scenario would be. 'The Fusilli Jerry' episode of Seinfeld did it perfectly. The insertion was accidental and the actor was the excellent Jerry Stiller. What is more, it was a very silly thing, literally fu-silly, that was inserted. Some may beg to differ, but a rectal insertion gag went quite wrong in the sitcom 'Peep Show'. The problem was that the object was sexual and it was being intentionally inserted by someone else (although, we don't really know for sure whether Jeremy had his girlfriend bugger him with a dildo). Having said that, it did well to amplify the pain factor that makes the show so engrossing.

I don't really know why rectal insertion is funny. It might be a manifestation of the hetero-man's fear of anal sex. In fact, I would believe its a fear shared by women and gay men also. Any opinions on the matter would be appreciated.

The other bastion of hilarity in my eyes is the matter of bestiality. Now, I don't want to insult the people of this world who make an honest wage from masturbating porcines. I'm sure that giving a hand-job to a Tamworth is an invaluable service to society and should be saluted as such. But just the fact that there exists the job description (albeit colloquial) of 'Pig Wanker' is never not funny in my mind. There is a punchiness to that two-word phrase that makes it sheer poetry to my adolescent idiocy. Its not quite bestiality, but its inherently a situation where someone is forced to do something revolting against their will.

Next week, I might remember to analyse (and not 'anal-ise' hur hur) Tibetan humour and talk about what Tibetans find humourous.

By the way, you will never read on this weblog any such annoying internet abbreviations as 'ell-oh-ell' or 'eye-em-aitch-oh'.

Ciao for now.